More and more women are finding out they have ADHD as adults, often after years of feeling that they were working twice as hard as everyone else just to keep up. For many, the diagnosis brings relief and a new way of understanding themselves. It also raises a fair question: why wasn’t it picked up sooner?
This article looks at why ADHD is often missed in girls and women, why it tends to surface in adulthood, and what support is available, including at work.
How ADHD can look different in women
ADHD has long been associated with hyperactive boys. According to the NHS, ADHD is recognised less often in women than men, possibly because women with ADHD more commonly show inattentive traits, which can be harder to spot than hyperactivity.
In practice that might look like daydreaming, losing track of time, drifting off in conversations or a constant feeling of mental clutter, rather than visible restlessness. Some women also become skilled at masking these traits, working late, over-preparing or relying on elaborate systems to stay on top of things. From the outside, everything looks fine. Our article on the signs of ADHD in women you might not know about goes into more detail.
Why diagnosis often comes later
Traits missed in childhood
Quiet, inattentive girls rarely cause disruption in a classroom, so teachers and parents may not see a reason to look further. Some girls are labelled as shy, disorganised or anxious instead.
Demands increase in adulthood
Coping strategies that worked at school or university can stop working when life gets busier. Starting a career, managing a home, caring for children or taking on a more senior role all add demands on attention, planning and memory. That is often when women start to look for answers.
A picture based on boys
Because ADHD has so long been associated with hyperactive boys, the picture many people hold of it doesn’t always match how it shows up in girls and women. Women who don’t fit that picture can find their concerns overlooked.
Support after diagnosis
Medication
The NHS lists medicines such as methylphenidate and lisdexamfetamine as treatment options for adults. They must be started and monitored by an ADHD specialist. Medication works well for some people and not for others, so it is a decision to make with a clinician.
Talking therapies
The NHS also mentions cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) and mindfulness as options that may help adults with ADHD, including with anxiety or low mood that can come from years of unrecognised needs.
Community
Talking to other women with ADHD can be one of the most helpful parts of a late diagnosis. Online and local groups offer a place to share strategies and feel understood. Some women find it encouraging to read about successful women with ADHD in public life.
ADHD and work
A diagnosis can also change how you approach work. You might decide to tell your employer and ask for reasonable adjustments, such as flexible hours, written instructions or a quieter place to focus. Our list of reasonable adjustment examples has more ideas, and our disclosure statement can help if you decide to share.
If your employer can’t cover the cost of support, the government’s Access to Work scheme may be able to help. Employers can find more guidance on our ADHD in the workplace page.
How Enna can help
A late diagnosis is often the point where people rethink their careers. If you are looking for an employer who understands ADHD, browse the Enna jobs board or set up job alerts. If you are staying put and want support to make your current role work better, our workplace coaching helps ADHD professionals build strategies that suit how they think. You can also reach the team at hello@enna.org.
