You might work alongside someone every day who always seems polite, professional and switched on. That person may be spending a huge amount of energy just to appear that way. For high-masking neurodivergent employees, that is often the reality.
Plenty of people who are autistic, who have ADHD, or who are otherwise neurodivergent, feel they have no choice but to hide parts of themselves to fit in. On the outside, everything might look fine. Inside, it’s often a very different story.
This post explains what high masking looks like at work and what colleagues and managers can do about it.
What is masking?
Masking is when a neurodivergent person suppresses or hides their natural traits to blend in with what’s seen as socially acceptable. The National Autistic Society’s guide to masking explains how it can help people cope day to day, but can also take a toll on mental health and sense of identity. In the workplace, masking might include:
- Forcing eye contact even though it’s uncomfortable
- Preparing and rehearsing social interactions ahead of time
- Holding in fidgeting or stimming
- Trying not to speak too much or too little
- Staying quiet in group settings to avoid saying the wrong thing
Some people do this occasionally. Others do it all day, every day. That’s what we mean by high masking. And it’s exhausting.
Why do people mask at work?
Many neurodivergent people start learning to mask from a young age. They learn what behaviour is praised, what’s corrected, and what makes them stand out. By the time they reach adulthood, many are used to putting on a version of themselves they think is more acceptable.
At work, the pressure is even greater. People want to be seen as professional, reliable and easy to work with. For someone who communicates or processes information differently, the easiest way to achieve this might be to hide who they are.
But even if masking helps someone get through the day, it often comes at a personal cost.
The impact of high masking
People who mask tend to look like they’re doing fine. They may appear competent, friendly and sociable. Because of this, they are often overlooked when support is being offered.
Meanwhile, they might be:
- Mentally and emotionally drained
- Struggling with anxiety or burnout
- Afraid of being misunderstood or exposed
- Feeling like they’re performing rather than being themselves
- Losing their sense of identity
Masking is sometimes described as an invisible form of emotional labour. When it’s done constantly, it can harm mental health and lead to long-term exhaustion. TV personality Christine McGuinness has spoken openly about this, as we cover in Christine McGuinness on meltdowns and masking.
Stories from high-masking employees
Here are a few experiences from people who have masked at work.
Sophia, a marketing executive with ADHD:
“I write and rewrite every message I send, just in case I come across as abrupt or unprofessional. It takes up so much energy.”
Zane, an autistic software engineer:
“I used to force myself to join casual office chats even though I didn’t know what to say. I thought it was expected. Then I’d go home and feel completely wiped out.”
Amira, a project manager with sensory processing difficulties:
“Team meetings with lots of noise made me feel on edge, but I didn’t want to say anything. I thought I had to just deal with it.”
None of this is unusual. Plenty of people put this much effort into simply appearing “okay”.
What can managers do?
You don’t always need to know who is masking. What matters is creating a workplace where no one feels they have to.
1. Build psychological safety
Let people know they can speak up about their needs without fear of being judged. Encourage honesty and reassure people that being different is not a problem.
2. Offer flexibility
Quiet spaces, flexible hours or remote working options can help people avoid the need to mask as much. Try offering adjustments as standard rather than waiting for someone to ask. Our reasonable adjustment examples for managers are a good starting point, and here’s why every office needs a quiet area.
3. Keep communication clear and predictable
Use direct, consistent language. Share meeting agendas in advance and follow up in writing. Avoid vague feedback and unclear expectations.
4. Don’t reward masking
If someone always seems to be the “perfect employee”, check in. Ask how they’re really doing. Often, the people who seem most together are the ones trying hardest to keep up appearances.
5. Use tools like working styles guides
Resources like Enna’s Working Styles Guide help team members share their preferences without needing to disclose a diagnosis. They also encourage everyone to reflect on how they work best.
What can colleagues do?
Colleagues matter here as much as managers. A few things help:
- Don’t judge someone for being quiet or needing space
- Avoid making jokes about “weird” behaviour, even if you mean well
- If someone seems off, ask if they’re okay in a private, respectful way
- Don’t pressure people to take part in casual office chat or social events
- Make room for different styles of communication and expression
You don’t need to know someone’s diagnosis to treat them with empathy.
Common questions about high masking
What does it mean to be a high-masking autistic or ADHD employee?
It means someone is constantly suppressing their natural traits to appear more “typical” at work. This might include hiding how they really feel, forcing themselves to behave a certain way, or silently putting up with things that cause them stress.
Why is masking harmful?
Masking takes energy and often leads to burnout, anxiety and a loss of sense of self. When someone feels they can’t be themselves, they may also stop seeking support or speaking up.
How can I make sure I’m not adding to the pressure to mask?
Be open to difference. Avoid assumptions about how someone “should” behave. Make it clear that you value people for who they are, not how well they conform.
Final thoughts
You might not always know who is masking in your workplace. So build a culture where nobody needs to. People who don’t have to hide their needs tend to stay longer and do better work.
Supporting high-masking employees means changing the environment, not the person, so people can work in a way they can keep up without burning out.
Next time someone seems unusually polished or always agreeable, it is worth wondering what that is costing them, and what you could change to make it easier.
How Enna can help
We work with organisations that want people to be able to stop masking. Our supporting and managing neurodivergent employees training helps managers spot hidden struggles and create psychological safety, and our Allyship in Action workshop gives colleagues practical ways to support each other. If you are the one masking, workplace coaching gives you a confidential space to work out strategies you can actually keep up.
To find out how your culture feels to the people inside it, look at our neuroinclusion audits and consultancy, or book a call with our team.
